My Story

My Story

I was born and raised here in Alaska and love this state for it's raw, untouched wilderness. I love that there are places in Alaska that I can go and not hear the hustle and bustle of civilization. I love spending time in outside in God's creation. There is a peaceful and calming affect that hearing a bubbling creek, with the birds singing in the trees has on me. 

I am a graphic designer by trade, working for Alaska's largest credit union. I belong to a growing fellowship of like minded believers, all hungry for the Kingdom of God to be realized in our lives. 

I grew up in the church, and in a christian home. I am the only boy out of six kids. My fathers only son. I remember as a little boy, one night talking with my two younger sisters. We were supposed to be going to bed, but as often was the case, we were up talking. I remember saying "let's all pray to Jesus and ask Him into our hearts". I don't know about them, but I did. I meant it.   

I remember as a boy preaching to my family as they sat in chairs playing along as we played church. I always said I wanted to be a flying preacher when I grew up. I was a pretty good kid throughout high school. I would prefer to go to youth group rather than sneak out and go party like some of my classmates. After high school, I moved to Nashville, TN to go to art school and went a little wild, I guess I felt like I wanted to see what the world had to offer. That's when I started running from God. Sure I kept one foot in the church, but I was sowing my wild oats. I was leading a double life. I was leading a life of sin and would occasionaly go to church on Sunday. 

I loved Nashville and swore I would never move back to Alaska, but after six years of leading a pretty unGodly, sinful life, circumstances brought me home. I swore it was only for a summer, just to see my family and what not. Boy was I in for a surprise. I ended up staying the following winter, then the next summer, and so on. I permently moved everything to Alaska the spring of 2005. I flew down to Nashville for my car, loaded it up with all my stuff and drove up to Alaska my myself. Looking back, I know that it was God's providence that led me back to Alaska. And His grace that sustained me even in my rebellion. He has been so patient with me. 

I moved to Anchorage in winter of 2005 and continued leading a double life. I tried going back to church and being good, but I had rebellion still leading my heart. I was "disciplined" while attending a very conservative congregation and basically excommunicated. This after I had gone to them, confessing my sin freely and asking for help. I needed help as the weight of my sin was heavy upon me. But this turned out again to be God's providence as that was not where He wanted me. From there I continued with one foot in the world and one foot in the church for some time. Often I would just sleep in and not go to church on Sunday morning because I had stayed out so late on Saturday night.. When I did end up going, I kept saying that the messages presented was like whip cream. It tasted good, but it had no nutritional value, no substance. 

I knew, deep down, that I was longing for something more, but I didn't know what. I was missing something in my faith although I wasn't sure what that thing was, nor was I truly aware that I was missing it at the time. I just bounced from church to church, unsatisfied, with a gaping hole in my heart that exposed a faith that was seriously lacking in substance. So I eventually stopped going to church altogether even as I continued flirting with the world. 

I heard the call of God upon my life even as I turned my back on the church. His call upon my life was like that song you get stuck in your head. But it's the most beautiful sound you've ever heard. And you know that if you try to ignore it, you just might go insane. I didn't ignore it, I couldn't. I was running from God but He was pursuing me.  So one day I cried out. I said "I want the God of Israel! I want the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob! I want the God who parted the sea for His people, the God who closed the mouth of lions, and turned the hearts of Kings. I want THAT God or no God at all!" 

Well let me tell you, that got a response. That was a turning point. His pursuit of me was greater than my ability to run and His call upon my life was unmistakable. 

I was in the bookstore one day, and I came across a book called "Save me from myself". It was the story of rocker and Korn lead guitarist Brian "Head" Welch. How God had saved him from a life of drinking and drugs and ultimately suicide. He had been radically transformed by God and reading his testimony changed my life too. It was what I needed. I had always had the thought that I needed to be a better christian to have a better relationship with God. Boy was I wrong. That is works based salvation and it's not a thing. Through Brian's testimony I was able to see that I first needed a relationship with Him and that HE would make me the kind of man I really wanted to be. That's when I stopped running. I started having a real relationship with Him where I would actually talk to Him. I came across the scripture:

Proverbs 3:5-6 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.Acknowledge Him in all of my ways. 

That's like coming to Him just as I am. So I did. I started talking to Him even though I found myself still in sin. But I acknowledged my sin before Him and asked Him for help.
When I was finally done running, I found a radio station while at work one day. I was self employed at the time, and made my own schedule and had my own office. I could listen to what I wanted. One day I was searching through iTunes internet radio and I came across a radio station called "Solace Radio: Messianic Torah 101". That peaked my interest I gotta tell you! I knew that Jesus was Jewish, and I knew that His disciples where Jewish. I knew that the term "Messianic" meant basically "Jewish believers in Jesus". So I thought, "hmmm…I can probably learn some cool stuff". I started listening and I sure heard some cool stuff! In fact, I heard stuff that made my jaw drop open. I never heard stuff like that on Sunday morning. They actually taught from the Old Testament! And not just stories but deep things. They called Jesus by His Hebrew name Yeshua. I was intrigued. About that time I met my wife. We met online through a dating website. I was actually about to shut off my profile and begin trusting God with that part of my life as I had been holding that back for some time. But Theresa's profile intrigued me. I sensed a kindred spirit as I read her profile. She had a longing for God. A real, genuine longing for Him in her life. That's what I was looking for. I wrote her. She wrote me back, and that started a series of exchanges that lasted about two weeks till we decided to officially meet in person. 

We met for the first time at my step sisters wedding reception. I had told my mother that I would be meeting a girl I met online after the reception and she candidly told me I should just invite her to the reception. I thought to myself "yeah right, what girl in her right mind is going to show up to a strangers wedding reception where she's going to no doubt meet a guy's family the same day she meets him?" But I thought, "what the heck." I texted her and asked her if she wanted to come, prepared for a reaction to stick to the original plan. To my surprise, she said "what should I wear?". She ended up showing up about an hour later and we hit the night off. I stayed at my moms house that night as I lived in Anchorage an hour away. The next day I went to go help cleanup from the wedding and afterwards, Theresa and I planned on meeting up again later that day. I was at lunch with my mom and her husband and Theresa came to join us, she plopped right next to me like she belonged there.
We spent the rest of the day together, visiting green houses and local shops. At one point I looked over at her and said, "are you ready for this?". She said "yep". We both knew. 

That was the first of April. We were married in July. Why wait when you know right?  That was our thinking. We were on the same path, we were both ready, neither one of us was getting any younger. My wife was a 4th grade teacher at the time. She started teaching again in August, so if we didn't get married that summer, we would have to wait a year, and who wants to wait a year when you know? You know? So

My wife and I started this journey together. I was sharing Solace Radio with her when we first met and we learned side by side. We soon started calling Jesus Yeshua, and about a year into our marriage we where led to start keeping the Sabbath (Saturday) day holy. At first this was just me not working as I usually worked on Saturday since I had my own business at the time. Over time we also decided not to eat pork, shellfish, shrimp, or anything else forbidden by Leviticus 11. We were not doing it to earn merrit with God or earn His love. We did it because we LOVE Him. We would often listen to teachings from 119 Ministries, Brad Scott, Bill Cloud, Rico Cortez and others who helped fill in the gaps in our faith. And we started reading from the Torah (first five books of Moses) regularly. I rememer the first time we read through the book of Acts after spending a couple years in the Torah. It was a revelation. I saw things in the book of Acts that I had never read before. 

I am a part of a growing fellowship of like-minded believers in Anchorage, Alaska, along with my wife of 4 years and our little boy. We are Hebraic-minded believers, and by that I mean that we believe that the scriptures can be best understood from the perspective of the people who wrote the Bible. The Authors of the Bible were Hebrew, the stories are Hebrew, the culture is Hebrew, the audience was largely Hebrew, the religion was Hebrew. The New Testament is steeped in Old Testament quotes and ideology.  It is essential that we read the New Testament as if the authors believed that the Old Testament was the inerrant, enduring word of God. Therefore it benefits us greatly to also understand the Old Testament as the foundation of the faith that the New Testament is built upon. As Brad Scott, one of my favorite teachers likes to remind us "There's nothing new in the New Testament, it's only true". The Bible was not written TO us, it was written FOR us. There is a big difference.

So I found what I as looking for. The hole in my faith has been filled.
Someone once said, "Jesus Christ saved my life, but Yeshua Messiah taught me how to live it." This has been true in my life and sums up my journey. Finding out that the Torah (law) of God is actually for followers of Messiah was a revelation. After all, how are we to walk just as he walked (1 John 2:6) if we are not practicing what He practiced and doing the things He did? Yes, the Christian church has done some amazing work of charity and loving the unlovable and feeding the hungry, etc., but that only PART of walking in the Masters footsteps. That is loving our neighbor, which is HUGE, don't get me wrong. But what about showing God we love Him? What does THAT look like? 1 John 5:3 By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and keep His commandments. Showing God we love Him means keeping His commandments, which are not difficult if we do it out of a heart of love for our Father. 

This "Teshuva Movement" (Teshuva means repent/return) is a return to the ancient path, where the good way is (Jeremiah 6:16) and is happening all over the world as believers from every denomination and creed are realizing that we have inherited lies as was prophesied in Jeremiah 16:19 and are seeking a more pure, more authentic expression of our love for God and real, tangible direction for what it means to walk just as our Messiah walked, in spirit and in truth.


I have discovered that one can learn a lot of they're willing to question what they think they know. This has been very true in my life and has lead me to greater understandings in things pertaining to how I see God's Word. I continue to pursue the one I love. The one who loved me first and pursued me when I ran the other way. He won my heart, and continues to do so. I owe Him my life, and my love. 

Where I once lived my life serving God one day a week (Sunday) while the rest of the week serving another god (myself), my life has dramatically changed. I used to say that God was a big part of my life, now I say God IS my life. I'm still a work in progress. I'm still pressing on toward the prize, and some days are harder than others. Some days I don't want to subject myself to Him, but at the end of the day, my heart is His. 

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